Two summers ago, Gabriel asked innocently,
"Mommy, what are the gays?"
I sat him down on our
porch and had a compassionate conversation about what it meant to be a
heterosexual versus a homosexual. Most boys have crushes on girls, but
some boys have crushes on boys (and vice versa.) They don't choose for this to happen. That's just the way
God made them. He understood this because he knows God makes us all of us
special. Being gay doesn't define a person, so the label of "the
gays" (as he heard on television) could hurt someone's feelings. I
assured him I would love him the same if he was gay, and he should support any
friends of his that he might later discover are gay.
He walked away more grown up and tolerant, and it
made me happy.
Last summer, Gabriel asked, "Mommy, how do babies
really get made?"
I sat him
down in our kitchen and had an informative conversation about sex and
reproduction. We covered it all in great detail. He understood when
I told him that God made men and women fit together like puzzle pieces.
We talked about the icky words that made him squirm. Erection.
Penis. Vagina. Sperm.
"Why
would anyone want to do that Mommy?!" he asked, appalled.
"Well,
buddy, because when you love someone, and you treat them with respect, and
you're careful with their feelings: Sex feels good. It feels like love.
The kind that makes your heart so happy that you can't help but
smile."
I warned him
sex could hurt people, too. I compared it to driving a car. When we
treat a car with respect and drive safely, we arrive to our destination excited
for the fun to begin. But if we drive recklessly and don't have respect
for the car, accidents happen, people can be hurt, and lives can change
forever.
He walked away more grown up and
informed, and it made me happy.
Recently, Gabriel asked, "Mommy, is Santa Claus real?"
I snuggled him in close to me
like I did when he was a baby. I told him that was a decision he had to
make on his own. It was his choice whether or not to believe in Santa.
I admitted truthfully that I still believe in the magic of Santa.
The anticipation of Santa creates joy and festiveness for kids and
grown-ups alike. The spirit of Santa encourages people to be kinder and
more generous. The tradition of
Santa makes memories that will last a lifetime. All of which are very real and very important.
"But does Santa put the
presents under the tree or do you and Daddy?" he asked, still not
satisfied.
"Well, honey, that answer
depends on whether or not you choose to believe in Santa," I answered.
He sat quietly. He didn't
push the issue. He hugged me and went off to play.
He walked away more grown up and confused, and it
made me sad.
1 comment:
im not sure im ready to see gabriel grown up.
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